User:CPettet (WMF)/workingoutlanguage

- Do propose a different path if you oppose one
Beginning with the good faith assumption that everyone is doing necessary work, the intention behind this idiom is to reinforce that to oppose an idea or approach is to engage in the crafting of alternatives. Mindfulness that it requires courage to stand up and say "I have concerns about this proposal" is required on both sides. An alternative proposal can be the result of reframing the original problem and that's OK. An alternative proposal can be an agreement to share knowledge and catch everyone up in the conversation and that's OK too.

No belittling
You belittle someone when you say something, or act in a way, that undermines the worth of the other person. Conflating the respect someone deserves to be shown with the complexity of their contributions to a group or endeavor is a commonly demonstrated toxic behavior. This is often expressed as trivializing code or contributions in a manner that calls into question someones intelligence or value. “Belittling” is never simply an evaluation or even a negative criticism. It is usually shrouded in the latter, but with the additional intention of hurting or demeaning the another person. In this regard, the medium is the only message delivered, and any possibility of a developing psychological safety disappears.

Origins
In order to improve our collective civility we have to create a common language of expectations and examine our assumptions about our current behaviors. This is not a how-to guide on embodying the ideal of a perfect teammate. There are too many intangibles not included for these guidelines to be the ending to any discussion, but these are a few specific touchstones that can make up the beginning. Humility, generosity, kindness, respect, and integrity are all implicit Do's.

The point of explicitly recognizing these behaviors is to increase our awareness that these practices are important and require attention and intention from each of us individually.